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Are you stuck in unwanted habits?
We can help you resolve
obsessions, compulsions and limiting beliefs.
Who is Obsessive - Compulsive?
Many people want more
motivation ... and some people
want less. If your motivation is too strong, it may be called
obsessive, compulsive or addictive. Sometimes it's wonderful to not feel
motivated ... especially with things that you don't really want to do.
We help people manage motivation!
Many people follow habits mindlessly, and some
habits can dominate lives. Do you endlessly criticize yourself?
Do you count things or check something many times? Do you repeatedly
follow rituals, such as touching a number of items in a certain sequence?
If you cannot stop manage your motivation, you might be diagnosed
as being obsessive compulsive.
You may count the number of times a dog barks, or passing
cars. Do you endlessly play a song in your mind, or are you unable to
stop playing video games or seeking internet pornography? Are you a prisoner
in your own mind, endlessly counting the bars of your cage?
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We help people transform
obsessions and compulsions
into ordinary temptations. |
Obsessions are thoughts that keep returning - often as
fixed ideas or limiting beliefs. Compulsions are habits such as washing
or compulsive eating. Both interfere with
enjoying life. Both are created in relationship disturbances and disappointments
- and show up as limiting beliefs.
Obsessions and compulsions may be why many chain letters,
spam and computer viruses spread. Regardless of the stupidity of the messages
- sick people have to read them and have to follow the
instructions. Many sales people take advantage of people with obsessions
and compulsions. They can often be told what they should want.
Obsessions may be combined with or complicated by other
symptoms - such as symptoms associated with trauma,
depression, sexual abuse
and bipolar disorder. If obsessions affect you - or
someone close to you - consider finding solutions before your condition
worsens.
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'We may not be able to choose the
situation in which we find ourselves, but we can always, always, choose
how we will respond'. Viktor Frankl |
Symptoms of Obsessions & Compulsions
You may feel embarrassed about your obsessive thoughts -
perhaps they don't make sense, or they seem crazy, even to you.
You may try to hide your compulsive habits, because you know they look strange.
You may feel alone and afraid - but you cannot seem to stop.
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Obsessed people often seem to
use unvoiced mantras (affirmations) ...
I think ... therefore I am special!
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Obsessions and compulsions are often similar to
non-chemical addictions, such as gambling or sexual addictions, and
to some symptoms of PTSD. They often have a similar cause. If you have
this type of addiction, or if you are trying to deal with trauma or
emotional incest, you may be trying
to escape from unpleasant feelings or trying to avoid difficult emotions.
If you have symptoms like these, you may feel irritable,
angry and withdrawn. As a child, you may have been accused of temper tantrums,
stubbornness or other problems. As a teenager,
you may have been accused of fighting your parents or avoiding school.
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Are you a
prisoner in your own mind, endlessly counting the bars of your
cage? |
Obsessed Children
Obsessions can take a child's time and energy,
leaving less time for homework or
household chores. Children may feel they must do their rituals exactly
right, to avoid feeling bad. They may feel stressed before they can go to
school or to bed. They may not sleep well, and feel exhausted.
Such children may feel physically sick and have
stress-related symptoms such as headaches or upset stomachs. They
may worry about bacteria and toxins, and about being perceived as
crazy.
They may not get the emotional support that they
need, not because their parents are uncaring, but more often because
their parents are confused and bewildered. If the child's behavior is
called frustration or anger, the parents may punish
the child for daring to show these emotions.
Children with obsessions and compulsions may be angry
to parents who do not comply with their demands. A child with a cleanliness
obsession may demand to shower for hours. Teenagers who are depressed or
using psychoactive drugs seem to have a higher risk of developing OCD.
Obsessive Liars
If children grow up with lies ... lies are normal
communication. Sometimes lying becomes an addiction, just like smoking,
drinking, etc. Most liar lie to people when they feel that it will
help them gain something. A compulsive liar lies naturally, and may not realize
that they are doing something abnormal. It's just words.
Compulsive liars are so comfortable when lying that they feel
no regret nor remorse. However, their behavior has unpleasant consequences. We
can help people who have suffered enough from this.
Drugs & Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder
Many health professionals recommend medication.
Although antidepressants may not affect OCD symptoms, the following drugs
are considered to be effective: clomipramine (Anafranil),
fluvoxamine (Luvox), fluoxetine (Prozac),
citalopram (Celexa), sertraline (Zoloft) and
paroxetine (Paxil).
These drugs affects blood serotonin - a
neurotransmitter that nerve cells use to communicate. Serotonin receptors
are spread throughout the brain; so its uptake and release can affect a
huge part of life. See Side Effects
of Common Drugs.
As we find that most obsessions and compulsions reflect
relationship disappointments, we find it strange that so many people use drugs
to try to repair relationships. Addictive, psychoactive drugs may have their
place, and are very profitable for those involved in their distribution,
but we prefer lasting, drug-free solutions.
Solutions for Obsessive Behavior
We help people recognize and change relationship
entanglements and trauma associated with unpleasant emotions or difficult
behaviors. This helps people control emotions and the compulsive behaviors
and habits that those emotions motivated.
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I used to compulsively make and
remake my bed, endlessly rearrange our children's toys, and do other things that
seem ridiculous now. I asked you for private coaching although I had been with a
therapist for three years. When you said four to six 2-hour sessions, I thought you
were crazy. But in the second session, I found a frightened child inside me
... you helped me love her. By the fifth session I seemed to have healed myself. |
Many obsessions seem to represent toxic traditions
within families. Obsessions and compulsions often seem to compensate
for identity loss - in which a person has:
- lost access to parts of self
(often associated with trauma)
- lost access to own identity (often associated with
child abuse)
- identified with another person (often associated
with toxic family secrets)
- identified with two people simultaneously
(often associated with parental conflicts)
We offer prompt and effective
remedies for these examples of identity loss. We help motivated people
find a stable sense of integrity. Then we can resolve toxic relationship
bonds and emotional trauma, and find mentors or role models who inspire
development, happiness and success.
Phobia
Phobias are sometimes grouped together with obsessions
or compulsions. Many phobias are examples of accelerated learning -
something happened that a person can never forget. We often help people
dissolve phobia and phobic reactions in brief time frames.
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I had a phobia of organizing or being too
organized - it felt like death. During my coaching I suddenly remembered that my
mother had organized our home perfectly before her suicide attempts ...
I found her ... I was twelve ... I still don't enjoy organizing but those
terrible emotions have diminished. Newport, Wales |
Competent Coaching
Well-educated may not mean competent. Although
exposure and response prevention are commonly used to treat
obsessions and compulsions, we have massive experience in dissolving
relationship entanglements, and we offer you choice:
Online Coaching for Obsessions and Compulsions
Consult a physician about obsessive or
compulsive disorders (OCD) or medical conditions.
Plagiarism is theft. Copyright ©
Martyn Carruthers 2005-2012 All rights reserved.
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