|
If sense of life can be replaced by guilt, shame
and depression, then abortion is a spiritual issue.
If you feel
strong emotions as you read this - consider contacting us.
Part 1: Consequences
of Abortion : Part 2:
Relationship Consequences of Abortion
Spiritual Consequences of Abortion
Abortion offers high incomes for those people who
are able and willing to provide it. Whether or not abortion is murder,
and whether or not a fetus can experience pain are controversial legal
and medical opinions. But consequences don't seem to care
about good intentions, opinions or laws.
Some of the emotional consequences of abortion are
described here. In this article I focus on
spiritual consequences of abortion. (This information is also
relevant to other situations where children die young - including
accidents, miscarriages, still-birth or crib deaths.)
During an abortion, the key people are the mother,
the father, the aborted child, and the abortionist. (Abortions, miscarriages,
stillbirths and crib deaths may also affect siblings even when they are
not told). The families of these people may also be affected by this
touch of death, a common symptom being chronic
melancholy or unexplained sadness
Ignored problems often get worse. Many people affected by
abortions (and other family secrets) have no idea why they are suffering,
depressed or melancholic. Those people may use legal or illegal drugs to avoid
the emotions without considering the spiritual causes and consequences.
The financial, medical and social benefits of abortions
may seem obvious, while damaged relationships, guilt, depression and addictions
are not. Often an abortion makes medical or financial sense - for example
if a pregnancy endangers a mother's life, or is the result of a rape, or
the parents cannot afford to raise a child. Spiritual consequences are about
happiness and
sense of life.
|
After my second abortion, I
was severely depressed ... I was almost suicidal.
Singapore |
Primary Consequences
I suggest that the primary spiritual consequence
of abortion is a depressed ability to feel joyously connected to
families, to partners, to friends, to communities, to humanity or
to God. If sense of life can be replaced by guilt, shame
and suffering, then abortion is a deeply spiritual issue.
We help people resolve these painful issues. We help people dissolve many of the consequences of abortion I mention
here. Our coaching can help people deal with the spiritual
consequences of abortion - to resolve guilt, clarify
relationships and regain a happy sense of life.
Guilt, Shame & Clarification
Guilt depresses life. Being joyous may not make sense
if you have hurt or killed someone. We help people resolve many types
of guilt issues result from having hurt or betrayed people.
Whether or not a fetus has a legal status as a human being - most people
perceive a fetus as a potential child.
When we coach people to clarify their important relationships, many are
surprised to identify an aborted child as a significant relationship.
People often describe some sort of unpleasant feeling that
seems to limit or block the expression of love and happiness within a family. As we help people
explore and assimilate their blocks - secret abortions, miscarriages,
stillbirths or crib deaths often become obvious.
|
You asked if my mother had an abortion between my brother and me. I was certain
that my mother would have told me. Later, my mother
said that she did have an abortion at that time - in another town under a
false name - and that nobody - not even my father - knew about it. Warsaw, Poland |
Abortion & Intimacy
Arranging an abortion often decreases intimacy between
partners. Sometimes separation or divorce may follow an abortion, although couples may not recognize that their subsequent
estrangement and separation are consequences of the abortion.
Sometimes, a woman may arrange an abortion unwillingly, following an
ultimatum from her partner, that either she arranges an abortion or he
leaves. In our experience, it is unlikely that such couples will continue intimate partnership,
even if they stay together.
Similarly, some pregnant girls are told by their parents
to get an abortion or to leave the family home. It is hard to imagine joyous
family reunions following such actions.
If a woman has an abortion despite the father's desire for the child
to be born, the consequences may also include the end of romantic intimacy,
although the couple may stay together for other reasons.
|
I was happy to be pregnant, but my husband made me have an abortion. He
threatened to leave if I didn't. I got an
abortion, but afterwards I felt like a cold fish whenever we had sex. It
was two bad years before we divorced. London, UK |
Ghosts, Abortions & Lost Children
Many people describe feeling haunted by ghosts
or spirits. A spirit is often seen as a dark shape
close to the person, or felt as an unpleasant cold feeling, that may seem to bring or cause depression and prevent
long-term happiness.
As many religions forbid abortion, parents arranging
an abortion may also feel a diminished relationship with their family, community
and with their God. To our initial surprise, we found that
this diminished sense of life seems to be equally true for
agnostics and atheists.
The birth order
of children is important during systemic coaching.
Family members may perceive an abortion as a bad feeling, a dark
energy or as a hole in the family. Subsequent children
may feel this hole, and be strongly affected by it. (If seen as a spirit,
a child may consider it an imaginary friend.)
Compensation for Death?
We notice that, following an abortion, the first pregnancy
of the next born sibling will often result in a miscarriage or be deliberately aborted,
and/or the next living child often show signs of
identification with a dead person (e.g. chronic melancholy).
Often the siblings of an aborted child, particularly the next-born,
say that they have been searching for some important person who seems to
be missing.
Many people have described such searches to us. They
searched for a special someone - perhaps a soul mate
- who would make things right!
Some people will find and marry a person who appears to have these
missing qualities. In this way, a hole in a family
system can be filled - temporarily at least.
We often
find that a family member expresses the hidden emotions of a relative. Even
following secret abortions, other family members may
feel that something is not right, that something is missing. This
feeling of not-rightness seems to be experienced by family members of
subsequent generations! A potential child was killed at the parents request. We
help people resolve such blocks.
Identification with a Dead Person
If a later child identifies with the missing
child, that child may grow up melancholic and highly sensitive to other
people. (This includes psychic sensitivity - we note that many psychic and healers boast
about having dead spirit helpers). As children, they are often fascinated by
death, dying and gore.
Occasionally, we meet people whose parents tried to abort them, and
failed. Such children seem to grow up fearful and distrustful of one or
both parents. We suspect that a child not only knows what happened in the womb, but also that a fetus can respond to the
mother's emotions even before birth.
Consequences to Abortionists
We have noticed that people who profit from abortion whom
we have met may become increasingly dissociated (unable to feel ANY emotions)
and generally callous towards human life.
This is often reflected by a lowered ability to enjoy intimate relationships,
spiritual experiences or lasting happiness. The doctors and staff of abortion
clinics that we have met seem to have a higher risk of addictions and depression
than in medical clinics that support and nurture human life.
|
Your writing about abortion is nonsense. Abortion is
not murder anymore than liposuction,
and the proper term is 'abortion
doctor,' not 'abortionist. Anonymous |
The families of an abortionist and staff of abortion clinics
may search for distractions instead of happiness, depression instead of
sense of life. Their children may experience learning disabilities and
chronic psychosomatic disease - whether or not they consider themselves to be
spiritual.
Spiritual Dimensions of Abortion
Reality appears to have a spiritual dimension, which, as it flows
into human existence, can transform whatever it touches. I believe that
spirituality is about acquiring virtues that support long-term happiness
and that we often develop virtues under unfavorable and uncomfortable conditions.
If you experience danger, you can develop
courage, and if you experience lack, you can develop generosity. If you
experience guilt you can develop purity. If you experience depression,
you can develop compassion. We can help you resolve emotional
and spiritual issues.
Online Coaching after Abortions,
Miscarriage etc
Plagiarism is theft © Martyn Carruthers 1998-2011
All rights reserved
|
